To truly reveal one’s self is a daunting prospect. It is common to hide your true self in fear of social rejection or humiliation. Although we’re all told to be true to yourself and never be afraid to really express who you are, social and societal expectations have squashed these philosophies, and have consequently squashed me. Obviously, my entire life hasn’t been lived in a dreary and depressive state. I have laughed, snorted, shouted, yelled, screamed, dreamed, learned and smiled, and all of these emotions and experiences stem from different people and situations in which I have lived through and grown. A major experience that cannot be overlooked when it comes to major influences in my life is that of my medical diagnosis.

The story is a common one. Boy meets girl, boy and girl have defective recessive genes, they decide to have a baby together and out comes their beautiful angel. All is well in the household until I start to walk strangely and come home from school crying, devastated that my primary school peers were teasing and laughing at me during sports day. After much confusion, and even allegations from my parents that I was simply being lazy (they have since apologised profusely), I was diagnosed with Limb Girdle Muscular Dystrophy in 2003 at tender age of twelve. From that moment on, my world turned upside down. My beliefs changed, my future became (and is still) unsure, my family and friends suffered and I turned from a sweet and gentle little girl to a pessimistic atheist who enjoys watching gory horror films. I had been fortunate to experience a normal childhood up until the age of approximately nine years old, but once my symptoms started evolving (weak arms and legs, loss of proper balance and control); I began to spiral into depression. Although I have never been clinically diagnosed, as I don’t see any ‘cure’ for this kind of feeling, I have always felt like there’s a dark cloud hanging over my head, ready to start raining at any moment. I’ve become paranoid about social situations, obsessive about the way in which people perceive me and entirely focused on trying to prove myself worthy. Whether this is through excessive academic achievements, or even establishing myself as a ‘character’ within my group of friends,

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